The British comedian, in character as dorky journalist Borat, showed up to “cover” the “wedding” of Pam’s dogs, Star and Luca. (Yeah, I ow, dog wedding? Hey, it’s a Hollywood thing.) But apparently Borat, dressed in a bathing suit and leather jacket, was so overcome by Pam’s, um, charms, that he rushed at her and executed a rugby-style takedown. Which, given her ratio of silicone to actual flesh, meant she probably didn’t feel a thing.
Recently, on her way back down the well-worn path to her local rehab facility, actress Courtney Love announced that she was expecting a baby with British comedian Steve Coogan.
This was news to the star of “Around the World in 80 Days” star, whose relationship with Kurt Cobain’s widow lasted barely two weeks. A spokesman for Coogan, a native of Manchester born to Irish parents, dismissed the rumors as “ridiculous.” As for Courtney, she’s not only denying the pregnancy story, she’s also acting as if she’s above it all.
Ireland Online quotes her telling a friend, “Given the Grade A stars I’ve dated it’s embarrassing.” But then, given Love’s status as a legendary hell-raiser, imagine how Steve feels.
In more Courtney news, London’s Daily Mirror reports that the former lead singer of the neo-punk band Hole once considered the pros and cons of spending, um, quality time with British pop god Robbie Williams. When the two met up at a music industry event, Courtney told the tattooed hunk that her friends thought he’d be a perfect, um, playmate for her.
“But I can’t . . . because of the pop thing,” she (supposedly) growled at him.
Never one to be at a loss for words, Robbie responded, “I can’t . . . because of the ugly thing.” Which was unchivalrous to say the least. But you know how sensitive Robbie is about his music.
Alec Baldwin will receive this year’s Linda McCartney Memorial Award from animal rights organization People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. The actor is being lauded for his involvement in the PETA documentary “Meet Your Meat,” which highlighted abuses in the meat processing industry.
As if coming up empty-handed at the VMAs wasn’t bad enough, Irish rockers U2 have attracted criticism from a high-profile, not to mention high-pitched, source. Sharon Osborne – wife of Ozzy, mother of demon spawn – er, youthful performers Kelly and Jack – has slagged off Bono and Co. for being “boring as hell.”
Sharon, whose rocker hubby once bit the head off a dove in front of horrified record company executives, is unimpressed with U2’s “Vertigo Tour.” Ireland Online quotes the outspoken redhead ranting, “Talk about a knees-up! Have you seen U2’s live show?. . . It’s like watching CNN.”
Taking a leaf out of Posh Beckham’s book – presumably, one that she read (see story on opposite page) – ready-to-pop-star Britney Spears wants to give her baby a name that’s elegant. Evocative. Oh, and geographic, as well.
The very impressionable Mrs. Federline has resisted her husband’s entreaties to name the child after himself – as Conan O’Brien noted, why would she want to call the child “Lazy Jackass”? Instead, the “Toxic” singer is leaning towards Addison Shye if it’s a girl, and London Preston if it’s a boy.
“Ever since I was a little girl I thought, for a boy I love Sean Preston, or London Preston,” she told Marie Claire magazine. “Isn’t London pretty?”
Of course, it’s not just the euphonious sound of the word that has charmed her socks off. London is where she and the dancer called K-Fed first, um, hooked up. In the heady first days of their romance, the pair were happily unencumbered by thoughts of Kev’s then-current flame and baby mama, actress Shar Jackson, who was a month away from giving birth to his second child.
Of course, it’s easy to read the whole thing as an homage to Posh and Becks, who saddled their firstborn with the monicker “Brooklyn” – a name inspired by the place in which he was conceived. And a name that will afford his school pals an endless supply of teasing ammunition in the years to come.
Former “Friends” star Courtney Cox Arquette doesn’t mind being a style icon, and she happily followed the celebrity crowd in giving her baby a loopy name (Coco), but she draws the line at being accused of having an eating disorder. The svelte actress insists that her weight is her own business, and that she shouldn’t have to feel “like I’m responsible for anorexia across the country.”
“I have never had any control over what anyone does,” he told OK! Magazine. “If I like myself at this weight, this is what I’m going to be.”
For the record, her eating habits are perfectly normal, no matter how the supermarket tabloids like to spin it.
“I remember one magazine said, ‘Courtney Cox Talks About Her Bulimia’ [but] I didn’t even say a word,” said Courtney. “They asked me a question and I said, ‘I wouldn’t throw up if you paid me. Why would I?'”
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All of you who’ve been looking at Robbie Williams and thinking, “You should be dancing, man,” must have been psychic. The hunky British pop singer has been tapped to star in the big screen remake of the disco classic, “Saturday Night Fever.”
Robbie will hustle into John Travolta’s boogie shoes with the full blessing of those high-pitched disco deities, the Bee Gees. The Brothers Gibb are financing the film to the tune of $30 million, and are said to be very excited at securing the services of the popular singer.
A source close to the Bee Gees said, “Robbie is the ideal candidate to play Tony – he can sing, dance, is a good-looking lad and has loads of charisma.” Translation: he’s sex on legs, yo.
In more Robbie news, the British heartthrob is thumbing his nose at the American music-buying public – as payback for snubbing his last few record releases.
The “Millennium” singer’s Ego has landed, apparently – with a thud loud enough to be heard around the world, But, sadly, not in the United States. According to contactmusic.com, Robbie’s new album, “Intensive Care,” will not be launched stateside. It seems Robbie’s still annoyed by the lukewarm reception he received a few years back, even though “Millennium,” “Rock DJ” and “Angels” all scored high on the pop charts here. Or it could be that he’s still gobsmacked that Jessica Simpson’s insipid cover of “Angels” was a huge hit. Whatever. He’s still determined to punish us Yanks for having bad taste.
“The only way one of my albums is going to get into an L.A. record store is if I leave it there myself,” he snarled.
Sometimes, life really does imitate art. Just ask Diane Keaton and Keanu Reeves.
The 59-year-old actress recently played Keanu’s (mature) love interest in the 2003 comedy, “Something’s Gotta Give.” Now, Diane and the 40-year-old “Matrix” star are a hot item off-screen, as well. Which is nice, except that Diane’s had more than her fair share of cute guys over the years, including Warren Beatty and Al Pacino.
O.K., you snarky, book-reading smarty-pants types out there: Victoria Beckham DOES read books. Lot’s of ’em. She just doesn’t get around to finishing them.
See, Bill Murray isn’t the only celebrity to who had something lost in translation, kids. It seems that Vic’s Spanish translator got a little confused – possibly by her Posh accent – and substituted “never reads” for “never finishes.” Amid criticism that her aversion to the printed word will have a detrimental effect on her three children, Posh insisted that the whole thing is ridiculous. (Or is that, ridiculosa?)
“Don’t be so ridiculous,” she fumed at the reporter for London’s Daily Telegraph. “Of course we read books together. Romeo and Brooklyn both love reading stories.”
And, with David doing so well with Real Madrid, the family is embracing de todo un poco.
“As they are starting to pick up basic Spanish words, they have some Spanish books as well.”
Welsh opera divette Charlotte Church is just filled to the brim with opinions. And, with a new album to promote, she’s not shy about airing them. In case you’re interested, she never “got” The Beatles, she’s no interest in the Rolling Stones, Coldplay’s Chris Martin is a whiney so-and-so, and Kate Moss’s druggie beau Pete Doherty is something that rhymes with “banker.”
Whew. Well, that’s a lot of convictions for such a small person. But there’s practical wisdom behind that angelic face as well. She feels that Robbie Williams’ bouts with depression would be alleviated if only he’d do fun, home things.
“He should come to a pub quiz with me and my mam,” she told Marie Claire magazine.
And he might want to follow Charlotte’s lead when it comes to choosing drinks, as well. The 19-year-old says that she now orders wine when she’s in a pub. It seems she hates the taste of wine, which means she won’t drink much of it.
Irish pop star Brian McFadden is terrified of falling into the dark, hellish pit known as the Sophomore Slump. Remainders bins are filled with lackluster follow-ups to million-selling albums, and for a fledgling artist, this is the worst scenario imaginable. Which is why the former Westlife star has decided to bring in the big guns – er, pens – to work on his next CD.
When Brian isn’t cuddling with his Aussie girlfriend Delta Goodrem, he’s perusing lists of possible collaborators. So hearing that Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee is a secret fan, Brian tapped Backstreet Boy cutie Nick Carter to work on his record.
Apparently, Nick isn’t just a pretty face – he’s an accomplished songwriter with a bunch of credits to his name.
“Even though Nick is in a boyband, he’s done a lot of writing for other people and that stuff has a much harder edge,” a spokesperson told Ireland Online. “Brian knows his next record needs to sell, and he’s hoping Nick can help him.”
Farrell: not so tough
O.K., kids: you heard it here first: Irish actor Colin Farrell has been hiding an embarrassing secret. No, it’s not the racy amateur video of him in action with a Playboy Playmate. Or the legendary drinking sessions. Or his former vocation as a boot-scootin’ line dancing instructor. Or that last, really awful season of “Ballykissangel.” No, this long-buried secret is so awful, so mortifying, so humiliating that It’s left him scarlet.
Ready? Here goes: that gurrier accent that charms the socks off American audiences is a total put-on. Ditto the tough-gu image. Yes, folks, according to his childhood pals, Colin is really a posh bloke trying to grab a little street cred.
An unauthorized biography of Farrell has has hit store shelves in Ireland, and it’s causing him a few blushes. In “Colin Farrell: Living Dangerously”, author Jane Kelly quotes a number of Farrell’s contemporaries who recall a “mummy’s boy” who used to get picked on.
One school chum, who grew up with Colin in Castleknock, laughed, “He pretends he’s from a tough part of Dublin but he’s not,” while another snorts that he “sounds quite broad Dublin these days.”
But, adds the old mate, “Everyone knows he’s posher than he makes out.”