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New & Noteworthy: No need to argue

February 16, 2011

By Staff Reporter

By Eileen Murphy

OK, quick: what do ex-Take That star Gary Barlow, tart Cranberry Dolores O’Riordan and ever-youthful rocker Sir Cliff Richard have in common?

If you guessed that they all have shamrock tattoos where the sun don’t shine, well, you get points for having a vivid imagination, but alas, ’tis not so. (At least, we hope not.) The three artists are among the established acts who feel snubbed by the radio stations in their native lands. And while those British boyos don’t seem to be putting up much of a fuss with BBC-1, Dolores has tossed down the gauntlet to – or, more accurately, started swinging the hatchet at – Irish stations 2FM and Today FM.

In a recent interview with one of the Irish tabloids, O’Riordan bared her soul (and more than a few teeth).

"We are Irish," she said. "And apart from an occasional play we are never on the national airwaves. No wonder we have only sold 150,000 [copies] of ‘Bury the Hatchet.’ . . . To get on the radio nowadays you have got to be a robot controlled by record companies who want to make a quick buck."

Hot Press reports that although album sales have been sluggish in Ireland, the record has managed to sell 2.5 million copies worldwide.

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The radio stations have not taken Dolo’s comments lying down. HP quotes a blistering (and quite hilarious) letter sent to the band by Brian Adams, the musical director of Today FM.

Noting that "at the time you spoke, Today FM had played your last four singles more than any other radio station in Ireland," Adams then hit his stride.

"We at Today FM . . . remain amused, bemused and downright amazed at your continual ability to shoot yourselves in the foot, bite the hand that feeds and generally get the old Doc Martens into the mouth," he wrote. He also included a helpful, if ungallant PS: "I am enclosing a roll of Gaffa tape for Noel, Mike and Fergal. I hope they may be able to use it before your next outburst!"

Not to be outdone, 2FM DJ Mike Moloney wondered aloud whether Dolores had entertained the notion that people might not be playing her records on the radio "because they think they’re [rhymes with kite]?"

Whatever. Personally, we think Dolores was just having a bad day, and she was probably pi . . ., er, ticked off that "Hatchet" didn’t receive a single nomination at the either the American or European MTV Video Music Awards shows – that’s gotta hurt. Especially since Dolores must have thought she had the judges wrapped around her finger

Love’s Labours . . .whatever

We know that actors are only pretending to be the people we see up on the screen, but even still, this next item gives us the dry heaves.

We hear that Kenneth Branagh – our favoritest Shakespearean actor outside of, well, anybody – is dating "Clueless" cutie Alicia Silverstone, his co-star in the recently completed film version of "Love’s Labours Lost."

Now, we’re sure she’s a perfectly nice girl, but really – gag us with a spoon. The age difference alone is kind of barfy – she’s 23 to his almost 40 – and we don’t even want to imagine the dinner conversation . . .

Alicia: "Ken, you are such a Baldwin!"

Ken: "I beg your pardon?"

Alicia: "Like, a Baldwin. You know, it’s the guy version of being a Betty!"

Ken: "Is that good or bad?"

Alicia: "It’s like, you’re the social director of the crew!"

Ken: "Are you speaking English?"

Alicia: "As if!"

Ken: "I beg your pardon?"

Everybody sings (sometimes)

Proving that music is indeed the universal language, acts as diverse as Joe Dolan and The Corrs have recorded REM’s "Everybody Hurts" for their upcoming albums.

Dolan, whose nicknames include "The Mullingar Mojo" and "The National Aphrodisiac," is the subject of an upcoming RTE documentary on his long and successful career. The new album, will also feature Bruce Springsteen’s "Brilliant Disguise" and – no, you’re not hallucinating – David Bowie’s "Starman."

The Corrs have also been busy little superstars, having completed the recording of their MTV Unplugged special and their new album, "The Corrs Unplugged."

In addition to the REM number, the album will include their cover of Fleetwood Mac’s "Dreams," Jimmy McCarthy’s "No Frontiers," and the band’s original hits "Only When I Sleep," and "Forgiven, Not Forgotten."

Briefings

We’re hearing that Madonna might be heading over to Dublin to appear at the MTV Europe Awards next week. Normally, this would probably cause all kinds of excitement on the banks of the Liffey, but the country will be overrun with divas who don’t need last names: Mariah, Whitney, Geri . . . well, actually, that last one needs some kind of modifier, like ‘former Spice Girl’ . . .

U2 guitarist The Edge and his partner Morleigh are no doubt handing out cigars or some sort of p.c. tokens to celebrate the recent birth of their son. The baby was born in the U.S., but we don’t know details like name or weight yet.

We have one bit of advice for the women of Ireland: lock up your menfolk – well, the ones you want to keep – right now! You have been warned.

Yes, as you’ve probably guessed, former "Baywatch" babe and current "VIP" star Pamela Anderson will be jetting over to Erin’s green shore sometime in the near future. Now that she and ex-hubby Tommy Lee are back together again, they plan to do some European travelin’. First stop will be Ireland, and then, well, the world’s their oyster.

As Pamela giggled to the Sunday World, "It is really important to visit other countries and see what people are like because I want to be a part of everything!"

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