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New & Noteworthy: Take me back!

February 17, 2011

By Staff Reporter

A rather melodramatic Mariah told Allure magazine that, during her five-year marriage to the music industry honcho, she fantasized about being kidnapped and set free from the relationship.
“I longed for someone to come kidnap me back then,” she told the startled journalist. “I’d have my pocketbook with me at all times in case I had to make an escape.”
In more Mariah news, the singer with the multi-octave range is not wasting any sympathy on her one-time pal, Eminem. According to pals, she’s annoyed that the potty-mouthed rapper insisted on playing some of her old – extremely embarrassing – voicemail messages onstage during his recent Anger Management III Tour.
Depending on who’s telling the story, the two either hung out as friends (according to Mariah) or had a romantic fling (according to Eminem) back in 2002. Whatever happened didn’t end well. As the relationship petered out, Mariah left a few indiscreet, whiny messages on his answering machine, which would come back to haunt her in a big way.
The “8 Mile” star couldn’t resist taking a very public shot at his former flame this year. At each concert, he would play a tape of Mariah pleading, “Why won’t you see me? Why won’t you call me?” just before launching into the tender ballad, “Puke.” (Sample lyric: You don’t know how sick you make me / . . . Everytime I think of you I puke.” Which is not the kind of thing a girl likes to hear. Especially on the radio.
Mariah, who’s enjoying a career resurgence with her best-selling CD, “The Emancipation of Mimi,” has decided to take the high road with regard to the rehabbing rapper. Her manager told the New York Post, “While we appreciate Eminem as an artist, lately his work has seemed tasteless and . . . mean spirited.” Ah, yes, the new stuff can’t hold a candle to his classics, like “Kim,” in which he tells his wife, “We’ll be right back – well, I’ll be, you’ll be in the trunk.” Such a romantic . . .

Given his level of success in Hollywood, you’d think that Matt Damon’s auditioning days would be long gone. But there’s only one role that the “Bourne Supremacy” star has his heart set on these days – and his old pal, Ben Affleck, holds the key.
Matt has been giving the performance of his life, trying to convince his “Good Will Hunting” partner to name him godfather of his first child. The hunky actor, soon to be seen in “The Brothers Grimm,” has assured Ben and the missus, actress Jennifer Garner, that he’s the most logical candidate for the job. After all, he’s got youth, energy, and enthusiasm on his side. Not to mention that most impressive attribute of all: deep pockets. And a willingness to use ’em.
“He’d be smart to give me that job,” Matt told the Internet Movie Database. “I’d spoil that kid rotten.”

Briefings
One might say that Ali G. lived most men’s fondest fantasy last week, when he tackled pneumatic “Baywatch” babe Pamela Anderson on the beach in Malibu. Well, except for the part where Pammie’s beefy bodyguards dumped him in the ocean, hat is.
The British comedian, in character as dorky journalist Borat, showed up to “cover” the “wedding” of Pam’s dogs, Star and Luca. (Yeah, I know, dog wedding? Hey, it’s a Hollywood thing.) But apparently Borat, dressed in a bathing suit and leather jacket, was so overcome by Pam’s, um, charms, that he rushed at her and executed a rugby-style takedown. Which, given her ratio of silicone to actual flesh, meant she probably didn’t feel a thing.

The president will drop in for a visit to the hit CBS comedy “Two and a Half Men” this season. But lest you start fretting about partisan politics and security issues, you’ll be happy to know that the visitor isn’t really the president; he just plays one on TV. And he’s definitely partisan when it comes to this show, because his son is one of the stars.
Now that his screen alter ego, Josiah Bartlett, will no longer be the commander-in-chief on ABC, Martin Sheen will have a chance to visit to the top-rated CBS comedy this fall. And Charlie Sheen says he’s “thrilled” at the chance to work with his dad again.
“I think it’s going to be something really special,” he told TV Guide. “It’s just sad that he’s coming because he has a little more free time this season.”

Mickey Rourke has found the secret of staying young. And he’s willing to share it with the world.
“In my case, it’s a little sleep and a lot of women,” he told the World Entertainment News Network. Specifically, he says, a lot of European women.
The Irish American actor, who’s made a comeback of sorts with a star turn in the film “Sin City,” says that he may give up Hollywood and move to London permanently.
“The girls in the U.K. are just the best,” he enthused. “[And] this country is incredible . . . I love it so much.”
The 48-year old veteran of such films as “Diner” and “Year of the Dragon” says that womanizing keeps him fit. “If you think I’m in good shape you should see me naked!” he crowed. Or just head to the video store and rent “9-1/2 Weeks.”

Hunky actor Aidan Quinn is all for respecting local customs – but his when-in-Rome attitude doesn’t extend to scarfing down sheep’s stomach, thank you very much.
The blue-eyed actor, who’s starring in a play at the prestigious Edinburgh Fringe Festival, says that he’s “been there, done that, with haggis.” But he admits to getting a kick out of another Scottish custom: the wearing o’ the kilt.
“I come to the Highlands for a week each year,” he told WENN. “I love wearing the kilt. I like feeling the breeze.”

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Former MTV host and Playboy model Jenny McCarthy is about to be Singled Out – again. The Chicago-born actress, and her manager-husband, John Asher, have filed for divorce.

Stop the presses: hard-partying starlet Tara Reid has finally admitted to having her figure surgically enhanced. The “American Pie” actress, whose most visible performance came this year when one of her, um, surgical enhancements popped out of her dress at P. Diddy’s birthday party this year, wishes everyone would stop making a big deal out of it.
“I mean, everyone does it,” she told Britain’s OK! Magazine. “I don’t know why I’m the one who gets so much attention.”
Well, since Reid’s in London filming her reality show, “Wild on Tara,” she might want to take the opportunity to consult Charlotte Church about her reputation. The sweet-voiced singer had her claws out for the blond Yank.
“Whenever [Tara’s] out, her [bosoms] keep falling out,” sniffed Charlotte. “It’s not very lady-like.”

It’s tough being an creative artist when your friends don’t appreciate what you do. Just ask Irish American actor Mark Wahlberg. The pride of South Boston told IMDb.com that his old pals – many of whom are ex-cons – ignore his mainstream movies in favor of ones featuring violence and nudity.
“Imagine all my friends watching ‘I Heart Huckabees,'” said Mark. “How am I going to explain an existential comedy to my buddy who just got out of jail? He wants to see [bosoms] and some heads being busted.”

Usually, actors looking to change careers aspire to be rock stars. Not so Sean Penn, who probably got the whole music thing out of his system during his marriage to Madonna. No, Penn’s burning ambition is to join the ranks of the Fourth Estate. Yes, the actor is – temporarily – trading greasepaint for a reporter’s notebook.
The Oscar-winner has written – or is that Penn-ed? – a five-part series about his experiences during a fact-finding trip to Iran in June. The series is being published by the San Francisco Chronicle.

Alec Baldwin will receive this year’s Linda McCartney Memorial Award from animal rights organization People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. The actor is being lauded for his involvement in the PETA documentary “Meet Your Meat,” which highlighted abuses in the meat processing industry.

Bad girl soprano Charlotte Church and her scrum-ptious rugby beau Gavin Henson are blissfully happy, y’all. Just stop trying to pin them down to naff stuff like engagements or weddings or sharing a kitchen, O.K.?
Gavin told London’s Sun newspaper that he feels like they’ve been together for ages. (That’s Gavin and Char, not Gavin and The Sun.)
“She is definitely the girl for me,” he said. “We are so comfortable with each other and it’s great.”
But it’s waaaay to early to start talking vows. Or even rental agreements. “It is the most serious relationship I’ve ever had,” he said. “But it’s still early days.”
In more Charlotte-related news, the Voice of an Angel singer has been advised to keep her yap shut about her private life – until she’s old enough to know better.
Shaun Ryder, lead singer of the band Happy Mondays, told Ireland Online that Charlotte will one day regret being so chatty about her love life.
“[She] might be a mature singer, but she isn’t a mature person,” he said of the 19-year-old sensation. “When she gets to about 28, she will be absolutely embarrassed at what she’s doing now and how she’s talking about boyfriends and stuff.”

Last week, on her way back down the well-worn path to her local rehab facility, actress Courtney Love announced that she was expecting a baby with British comedian Steve Coogan.
This was news to the star of “Around the World in 80 Days” star, whose relationship with Kurt Cobain’s widow lasted barely two weeks. A spokesman for Coogan, a native of Manchester born to Irish parents, dismissed the rumors as “ridiculous.” As for Courtney, she’s not only denying the pregnancy story, she’s also acting as if she’s above it all.
Ireland Online quotes her telling a friend, “Given the Grade A stars I’ve dated it’s embarrassing.” But then, given Love’s status as a legendary hell-raiser, imagine how Steve feels.

Say what you will about Madonna breaking tradition by performing at Slane Castle on a Sunday last year – hey, at least she showed up. Which is more than can be said about American rap star Eminem, whose abrupt cancellation of the European leg of his tour has left Slane owner Lord Henry Mountcharles, and 80,000 fans, high and dry. For the first time in over 20 years, the hills will not be alive with the sound of music.
Eminem’s Anger Management Tour III has been scuttled because the 31-year-old rapper is suffering from exhaustion and assorted health issues. He has reportedly entered a rehabilitation facility, which is just as well, because Lord Henry is struggling with his own anger management issues at the moment.
“I’m very taken aback,” he told the Irish Times. “I’m trying to be judicious with my words. I’m not very happy about what has happened.”
Because the show, scheduled for Sept. 17, was cancelled at such short notice, there is no time to find a replacement act. So Lord Henry and Meath get a year off, promoters get set to refund millions of euro, and the lawyers pore over the fine print to see about compensation. But the keeper of the castle is philosophical.
“It’s only rock and roll,” he told RTE Radio. But he likes it.

Westlife singer: I’m gay
Stating that he “wanted people to know the truth,” Westlife singer Mark Feehily announced last week that he is gay.
As Westlife makes final preparations to launch their new CD in the fall, the group’s most low-key member decided to set the record straight about his sexuality.
“I am gay and I’m very proud of who I am,” he told The Sun newspaper. “I’m not asking for any sympathy, or to be a role model to anyone else.”
The Sligo-born Feehily, who was one of the founding members of Westlife, is in a long-term relationship with Kevin McDaid, a member of British boy band V. He says that the two are happy, and not worried about reactions from the public.
“My close friends and family – the people I love – have been incredibly supportive,” said Mark. “And that’s what really matters.

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