Category: Archive

Oasis: wonder brawl

February 16, 2011

By Staff Reporter

The notoriously quarrelsome singer bid a quick buh-bye to a few of his pearly choppers over the weekend, when he and his bandmates got into a violent street brawl with a group of Italian tourists outside a Munich hotel. According to law enforcement sources, the band had been fighting amongst themselves (so what else is new?) in a restaurant. During this, er, rough housing, one of the combatants landed on top of the Italians’ table. Quicker than you can say whatsamattafoyou, the interloper was tossed back. Words were exchanged, followed quickly by punches, as the fight spilled out into the street.
Police were summoned and quickly broke up the melee. The cops threw five of the Oasis crew, including Liam and drummer Alan White, into the pokey for disturbing the peace. One of the band’s bodyguards was knocked unconscious and was rushed to a local hospital for treatment. Liam underwent emergency dental reconstruction to save his winning smile.
Though the band’s official website insists that the incident was “an unprovoked attack” on Gallagher and his Oasis mates by local youths, German police believe that the musicians were the instigators. Liam is facing a charge of dangerous assault, since he — allegedly — kicked an officer in the chest during the brawl. (Well, he is the star, right?) Unfortunately, no members of the opposing side were taken into custody — they’d beaten a hasty retreat before the cops arrived.

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